Tag Archives: Toys

The Jaguarundi Episode: One Eye on Your Butt, One Eye on Your Face, and One Eye on Your Justice System

Yeah, I have better judgment skills than, say, a judge!

Yeah, I have better judgment skills than, say, a judge!

If this isn’t the most stupid podcast in these United States, then I have no clue what is. Every gall-blamed week, Greg, Adam, and Casey talk about the most mundane, inane, and insane stuff you can shake a stick at. Like this week, for instance:

OK. So, isn’t it neat how nature made the sphincter? I mean, really ponder on that. Most all of your mammals have a freaking sphincter. From the littlest monkey to the biggest damned whale. All of them have buttholes. And they all close up to nothing, but some of them open up to gigantically large sizes! Imagine the butthole of a blue whale, if you will. That thing has gotta be immense. Could you get inside of it? Would you get inside of it? Should you get inside of it? Hell, it borders on a new philosophy!

No segue here: Did you ever see Popeye? Not the weird-ass cartoon, or the weird-ass comic strip, but the weird-ass movie. That movie was made by one of the greatest dead directors, Robert Altman, yet it manages to have the weirdest pacing, characters, and songs this side of Forbidden Zone. And that’s weird.

No segue here, either: Jury Duty sucks. If you are ever summoned for jury duty, do absolutely everything you can in your power to get the Hell out of it. It a waste of your day, and it is a waste of the American Justice System. Casey had to go, and look at him! He ranted for damn near seven hours about how stupid it is, and now he believes that the Bill of Rights should no longer include the right to a trial by jury. This is after only eight wasted hours! Imagine if they’d actually picked his ass!

Anyhow, whatever. It doesn’t matter because Everything Is Stupid.